God Loves Pharisees

Recently I was at a student development retreat where we were discussing the parable of the prodigal son. Now I loves me a good student development retreat, and I also loves me a good parable. As usual, Jesus tells an awesome story, the Pharisees get mad, and then they talk about killing Jesus. Years later some pastor says "lets take another look at this story and try to see it in it's appropriate context." That's code for "throw the pharisees under the bus."

Which, in most ways is appropriate to do. Pharisees will always be the poster child for "missing the point" because they had front row seats to the biggest person and biggest event in history, and were too focused on making sure they gave a tenth of their spices to the temple every Saturday and nit-picking the savior of the world for not washing his hands before he ate.

So I get the point. We are right to criticize the pharisees, especially because it usually seems like Jesus is doing it too. But Jesus is only doing it to make a point. If Jesus could love tax collectors, prostitutes, and the roman soldiers that were nailing him to the cross, he could probably also find it in His heart to love religious leaders who missed the point. (Granted, they did quite a bit of harm in his name).

All I'm saying is that Jesus loved everyone, and even though the pharisees were blowing it big time, they were trying. Which is probably the same thing you would say about me. Its just good to remember that we are all on the same side here and even though Pharisees will always judge sinners, it doesn't mean that sinners like us should always be judging pharisees.

(Although, I realize that pharisees are sinners, and I'm both a sinner and a pharisee at times)

Taylor in the News

Hey friends, sorry about my long absence. I've been tied up with life lately. Well, to be honest, I have been tied up playing "Donkey Kong." Which is not a very good reason to stay away from my blog.

Anyway, just wanted to continue to spread the word about good old Taylor U in the news. Most of the people who read this blog probably already know about this, but in case you didn't

Click here

I plan to blog some more over Christmas break, so hopefully I will be back here soon. Oh, and in case anyone is wondering, Cortney and I still haven't been able to get our driver's licences. I think there might be another blog dedicated to that saga coming up soon.

The Israelites

I'm not sure if I thought of something cool or if this is something that everyone besides me has heard before, but if you have heard this comparison before, I apologize.

I think it's cool how often God uses relationships in the Bible as a model for how he wants to relate to us. Marriage is a relationship that God uses as a metaphor, and so is his relationship with the Israelites.

I think there is a similarity between our salvation and the Israelites' acquisition of the promised land. In fact I think it's very similar.

The first step into the promised land was taking the city of Jericho. It was the threshold between the desert and promised land, a watershed moment in history. And God did all of the work. God brought down the walls of the city with one fell swoop after the Israelites marched around the city seven times. It was a miracle. The Israelites were given something they did not deserve through no effort of their own besides faith.*

After that miraculous victory they spend the rest of the book of Joshua and Judges trying to take the rest of the promised land by waging a long war with all kinds of people whose names end in "ite." God says that they need to mercilessly root out all of these people and eradicate them, claiming the land of Canaan for Israelites and the Israelites alone. It is a lot of hard work that requires generations of effort for the people of God. Lets just say that this campaign, which relied much on the efforts of man, had mixed results.

In the case of the modern day Christian,the promised land is the Christian life.** Getting in is the easy part. Well, actually it's the hardest part because it requires a miracle. But it's the easiest part for us because God does all the heavy lifting. It took the death of Jesus and the reworking of our entire understanding of God's covenant to get us there, but God was able to save us from our sins and usher us into a righteous standing with him. It is the watershed moment in our lives where overnight we have gone from sin and damnation to righteousness and Heaven. And it was all God's doing. Much like tearing down the walls of Jericho to usher in a new era of Israelite history.

What happens next is a little less miraculous, and a lot more difficult (for us). We have to actually begin living as Christians. It becomes time to root out and mercilessly destroy sin an our lives and claim it for God and for God alone. Using our own efforts, it is up to us to do the rest of the work and eliminate kill off the rest of the Canaanites (and whatever else-ites). This is a long and arduous process that God doesn't just do for us overnight. And if you are anything like me and the Israelites, I would assume that you are dealing with "mixed results" on this front.

And that's the story of judges. Theres some good stuff and some bad stuff, but basically things don't go well for the Israelites when they try to do things on their own. God should be their king and they should stick with him. Because when they forget to stay close to him and continue to conquer in his name, things get ugly. Just like in our lives.

"Well wait just a darn minute" you will say. "I agree with the first part of what you are talking about here, but you have gone to far with this "do it yourself" stuff you are describing. We do need to put some effort into killing off the sin in our lives. But you act like it's all up to us and God doesn't help us! We definitely need to rely on God to change us or we will never EVER succeed in "taking the promised land!""

That's a good point. You got me there. And that's exactly why we turn back to the Israelites. If you look at Joshua 7 you see this guy named Achan disobeying God and bringing a lot of ruin down on the Israelites. Basically, God does not support them in a battle and they lose big time. Joshua has to punish Achan and get their act cleaned up before God gives them another victory. You would think they would learn pretty well from this early example but...well, that's why the Old Testament stays interesting.

Even though it's "our job" now to win the victories, we really can't do it without God. If we are going to be like Achan and think that we have a better plan (and to be honest, if I were Achan I would be tempted to do the same thing) I don't think we should be surprised if we are not strong enough the win the victories we think we should win or take the promised land the way we thought we would. Ultimately, it's still God doing the heavy lifting. The only difference is that it's us doing the heavy lifting now too. Just like the Israelites.

"Wait a minute" you might say "That last sentence didn't really make a lot of sense. I was really following everything and you were drawing some nice little parallels there. But now I feel like you just dropped us in a paradox. Are you going to resolve that? Do you even know HOW to resolve that? Are you 100% sure what you are even talking about?"

Good question. The answer is "nope." But if you enjoyed the thought process without a definite conclusion, you're welcome. And if you didn't...well at least it was free.


*Well, that, and killing everyone in the city after the walls came down.
** You might also say it's heaven, but stick with me on this one.

Oh yeah. I learned the word "watershed" a while back and it's a fun one for purposes like this. It's a geographic term referring to how water flows. If there is a high point in the land all the water on one side of that point will flow in one direction, and all the water on the other side will flow the other way. So in the United States, the Rocky mountains act like a watershed. It's the point that says rain water is either going to flow towards california or towards the plains. It's used in a historical sense to say "before this moment, everything was one way, now that this has happened, everything is different forever."

Thanksgiving

As I'm writing this, it is almost Thanksgiving, so I think it's only fitting that I should write a holiday themed blogpost. Something that you can read as you sit back on your couch, watch the Lions lose a game, and drift off to sleep with the warm, comforting feeling of triptephan coursing through your system.

I just wanted to note that I think giving thanks is closely related to humility.

It's hard to be too prideful about who you are or what you've done when you keep in mind all the advantages and blessing you have had to help you get there.

I'm a smart guy. And a lot of times I am prideful about just how smart I am and how good of a leader I can be. But I would like to take some time to think of some of the things that go into that that I should be thankful for.

Genetics (both my parents were smart)
Both of my parents went to college
Grew up with smart sisters.
Dad read to me when I was young
There were many books in the house
My parents valued my education
My parents were involved with my education
I went to good schools
I had good teachers
I was encouraged to read
I have had the opportunity to travel
I had the resources to go to an expensive private college
I was encouraged to go to graduate school
I could afford graduate school

I am thankful for all of those things, and I am responsible for none of them. It's true that I have worked hard and studied to be as smart as I am, but that is just one part of it, and probably not even the most important part.

I would like to be in the habit of being consciously thankful for the things in my life. ESPECIALLY when it is in regards to things about which I am prideful.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone, I hope you are all awed and humbled by God's generousness in all of our lives.

Something I made

Hey Guys, Not sure if I put this on my blog before on not...I think it was on facebook.

I just presented this lil' "educational" about video games at Letourneau.

I was also talking while I was showing this presentation, so if you wonder "what's up with that picture?" I bet I probably would have explained it if you had actually been there. The main point is, As Christians we are exposed to a lot of things that are different from how God intended them to be. We are watchful and vigilant about some of these things when they overtly challenge or morals, but we should look also for subtle implications and themes that promote values and ideas contrary to what we believe. We do this pretty well with music and movies (sometimes) but how about with video games?

Enjoy (if it works...click in the bottom right hand corner of the little window, it will give you an option for a full screen mode or other viewing modes. If you just view it in this column it will cut off the right side of the screen)

Video Games on Prezi

Assessment

As we have learned in higher education, assessment is a really good thing that gets a really bad reputation. Mainly because professors don't want other people telling them what to do. But professors use assessment too. they do it all the time. But when they do it it's called "grading."

I've seen grading from both sides, I've been a student for a long time, and I married a teacher, so I understand that students and teachers look at grading in very different ways. For the student, the grade is something you strive for. Everything you do is to "make the grade" and it is the end goal. For a teacher, the grade is largely irrelevant except that it is a way of measuring learning, which is actually the end goal.

Teachers don't really care about grades because they are arbitrary letters. What they care about is learning, and grades are just the methods they use to measure them. Students, on the other hand, are always confusing the measurement for the goal itself. That's why they will sometimes ask professors "is this going to be on the test?" Students want to know what they will be evaluated on. Professors hate that question because it shows them that the students are just trying to jump through the hoops for the purpose of grades instead of trying to actually become a master of the material.

As a student,I know professors sometimes got frustrated that we wanted to know about the test, and that we focused so much on grades (I am personally guilty of this as well), but I always wanted to say "I promise that I'll stop thinking about the grade the moment you promise to stop grading me." It's hard not to focus on the grade when that is the only measurement you have to go by, and when that measurement is permanently recorded on a transcript that might affect your future.

All of this brings me to my point about Christian living. I believe a student struggling for his grade is caught in the same conundrum as a Christian reading the words of Paul. Paul is saying that it is not our works that save us, it is our faith. We need to be less concerned with the things we do, with the rules we observe, and with the level of righteousness we seem to be obtaining though our actions. Instead, we should be concerned more with drawing closer to God.

The question always comes up (and you've seen it on my blog before) "so Paul, does that mean we should just sin away without a care in the world?" To which Paul always responds "absolutely not."

A professor might tell a student "you need to worry less about grades and testing and papers, and focus more on learning the material, and developing a passion for the subject matter. You are too caught up on what you are going to get on each assignment that you aren't focusing at all on actually learning from what you are doing. And that's the most important thing." The student's response would probably be "does that mean that you don't care at all what I get for grades? So that as long as I think I"m learning I don't need to actually turn in the papers or answer any of the questions correctly?"

Unless this is the Dead Poet's Society the teacher will say "Absolutely not!"

Grades should be a natural outflow of learning. They are a reflection of true learning that helps the teacher understand what the student knows, and holds the student accountable for learning the true answers to the correct material. Good grading means that students who know more about the subject matter will naturally get better grades. Though this is not a perfect system, and sometimes tests and papers ask unfair questions or measure the wrong thing, this just means that sometimes teachers issue bad assignments, and not that grading is a bad practice in general.

You might say that grades aren't really a good measure because sometimes we know much about the subject but just miss a few specific things. For example, a senior in a calculus class might not do as well as a freshman in algebra class on an algebra exam because the senior now takes for granted many of the skills he once used in algebra and has relied on his calculator to do most of the work for him the past few years. But does that mean the senior knows less about math? No, that only shows a limited range of tests and grading. A different test with higher level math would clearly show that the senior in calculus understood much more math than the freshman. The algebra test was designed to measure a certain set of skills, not all mathematical ability in general. This just shows that a single test doesn't tell the whole story.

I hope you see that the above example is not an argument against grading. It's an example of why we should not place the ultimate emphasis on grading. Grades are relevant, but they are fallible. In the same way, we should not put the ultimate emphasis of our Christian walk on the fruits of our relationship with Christ. The emphasis should be on the relationship itself.

We should focus most strongly on what draws us nearer to Christ and on being transformed into His likeness. We should know His character and spend time with Him and reflecting on Him. However, we should not be unaware of, or irresponsible for the good things He would like us to do. I've heard it said "love God, and don't worry about the rest." And that's true if you are a perfect person with a perfect, unfailing love. But if you are a sinner like me, it might be a good idea to consciously pay some attention to some of the other "stuff" that goes into being a Christian, such as being honest, generous, patient, and humble etc... These are good things to work on because they are hopefully the kinds of things that will be revealed when we grow in our relationship with God, just like good grades should come when we grow in our understanding of math. Just don't make these good things the end goal, keep them in perspective where they should be...the results of true learning.

Perhaps I've gone around in circles too much on this post. Maybe I should have stopped earlier and let you draw all the inferences instead of trying to point them out myself. I wanted so much to get some of these ideas out there that this might be a poorly written post in which I just throw around words willy nilly and get as redundant as most pastors in a 3 point sermon. If that's the case forgive me, but I would like to create one more image with my words before I go. Now that I've said all this, I'll boil it down to one last thought.

A student who focuses on grades runs the risk of not truly learning. He may not develop a passion for his studies and will likely not retain much of the material. He shows no respect for the subject and has missed the point. A student who focuses solely on the material is much better and shows he understands what school is for. But if he fails to turn in his assignments how will the teachers know if he is learning correctly, or even the right material? He will eventually fail out of school because his great knowledge, unpracticed, will be worthless to him. A good student does focus on the material and not the grades. But it is still important for him to take the time to actually complete his assignments, as this is a form of studying too. They are not the most important thing, but they go hand in hand with the most important thing.

In short, I've spent way too much time worrying about my grade. I don't want to do that any more, and I don't think that me, or anyone else should ever ask God "is this going to be on the test?"

More Writings

Hello again friends

As you are well aware, I am a writer in the same sense that throwing a NERF football to your 8 year old nephew makes you a quarterback. In case anyone is interested in my latest "pass" I've provided a link to something I've been writing. As Hugh would say, it's part of my "files."

I haven't gone through and edited at all, so it's likely to be quite terrible. In fact, if you are one of those people who can't tolerate my spelling errors perhaps you should stay away. Or, if you are one of those kinds of people that doesn't find it that interesting to read all the ramblings of every 20 something year old who feels that the internet has given him the right to broadcast all his thoughts to people who don't want to hear them...then you should probably stay away too. If you are my parents, you'll probably read it because I live in Texas and you don't get to see me very much.

But anyway, here is the latest from my files. At the Robert Jordan like pace I write you can expect another gripping installment sometime next summer.

section 2

P.S. someone commented on my use of grammar on my blog the other day. She mentioned that I ended some sentences with prepositions. I'm sorry about that. From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which we shall not put.

Greatest Hits

Hey Friends

So I get a lot of feedback about my blog. Sometimes people say things like "hey Steve, I really liked that one post about the mini. Why haven't you written anything that funny the past couple of years." Or else they will say "Hey Steve, your spelling errors and typos are embarrassing. Seriously, it's painful."

And that's lead me to believe that my readers are loyal fans that have stuck with me over the years no matter how bad my spelling or how long my absences are. And I thought..."wow...that's weird." But I'm going to operate under the assumption that if you are reading my blog right now, there is a good chance that you actually like reading my blog. That's why I've gone back and categorized some of my favorite entries into an easy to find format. So that all readers, new, and old, can enjoy some of my best posts. (Or, actually, maybe the reason I did it was because I realized that I had posted some things twice, that I couldn't find stuff I was looking for, and that the reason I started a blog in the first place was to keep track of my thoughts, and that's kinda impossible if there is no system.)

Well whatever.

At the bottom of this post I've included some "labels." If you click on the labels they will take you to all my previous posts that have the same labels on them. So for example, all of my favorite "serious" posts are under the label "thoughtful."
All my favorite funny posts are labeled under "classic"

I felt a little presumptuous labeling stuff as "classic" and about half-way through I decided that was stupid, and that I was going to change it. But by that point...I was already half way through. And there was no way I was going back.

A smarter person would figure out a way to post all of these "labels" somewhere permanently. But you are reading my blog, so for now, if you want to find your favorite post, you are going to have to click around through the labels at the bottom. Hope you enjoy!

P.S. There has been some conversation about going back and fixing spelling errors and typos. I think I'm actually going to work on that some, but it's going to take a while, Rome wasn't built in a day...Though I doubt you could compare my Blog to Rome. Few cities though, no matter how small and crappy, were ever built in a day.

Stuff Girls Like: Being Scared

I know that men sometimes to stupid things like ask their wives to pepper spray them or eat acorns. As men, sometimes we invite negative physical experiences because we wish to prove how tough we are or because we are idiots.

Women, on the other hand, seem to find it fun to invite the negative emotional experience of fear. There is nothing that girls like more than being afraid of things that aren’t actually scary. Let me explain.

Girls will go to great lengths to muster up a feeling of fear in a very contrived environment. They will gather all their closest, most timid friends and rent “scary movies” in which poor helpless girls are isolated and terrorized by monsters or (the most terrifying enemy) men. Girls love to watch other girls in frighteningly compromising situations. “Oh know, that creeper is behind her and she broke a heel. What if she can’t run?” They will even go to great lengths to enhance the mood of terror and paranoia. “Hey, lets turn our the lights! Let’s watch a movie on Friday the 13th! Let’s invite Amanda, she always freaks out the most! Lets cut the phone line! How about we leave our headlights on so our car is dead if we have to make a getaway! Why done we leave all the doors unlocked and leave our address and a picture of us at a bar so maybe some drunk guys will come looking for us with malicious intentions while we are all sleeping!

My Wife and her friends like to go geo-caching. Which, if you don’t know, means using a GPS to look for a treasure that someone else has hid. The coordinates of these treasures are posted on the internet so other people can find the treasure It’s a fun little game. Except when Cortney and her friends are doing it, it’s not about the treasure. It’s about the fear. They only go at night and they only go to treasures that are buried either in the woods or in a cemetery.

Of course, they also need a man to go. Because without a man they are too scared to get out of the car and poke around the backwoods of Indiana by themselves. These nights are still fun though because they involve driving back in forth in front of a “creepy” road and saying “this time we’re gonna do it. This time we’re gonna go out there.” You can do that for at least 30 minutes before it’s gets boring and it’s time to go back to starbucks.

Being the man on this kind of trip requires caution and a delicate balance. Without my presence the girls can’t get out of the car. But if I go out of my way to make things TOO safe by saying ridiculous things like “I don’t think that’s an axe murderer, I think that’s just the guy who lives here” or “no, I’m pretty sure there isn’t much violent crime in this county” they will roll their eyes and tell me I’m ruining it for everyone. I am “no fun” and they wonder why they brought me. Of course, when I get bored of wandering around in the dark, they all follow me back into the car.

And then there is the haunted house. Girls love haunted houses because it gives them a chance to scream, it is scary, people threaten them and creepy masked strangers get to touch them in the dark.* They will wait in line to pay money for this experience.

As you can see, I have conclusively proven that Girls like to be scared, Cortney especially. But we don’t have enough money to hire strangers and professionals to scare her all the time. So I have decided that this month I’m going to have some “do it yourself” scares in my house. If you really want to make that special woman in your life feel extra special, scare the crap out of her with some of these simple, at home, do it yourself scares.

1) Get up in the middle of the night and open the front door and go back to bed. She’ll find it in the morning. This works best if you live in a sketchy neighborhood

2) Bring a live rodent in your house.

3) Ask a buddy to prowl around in your house while you’re asleep and make a lot of noise. For extra effect, have him steal all the pictures of your wife (he’ll give them back later).

4) Here’s an easy one—take advantage of nature. A good thunderstorm or Tornado warning can really bring home the family fun if you take advantage of it.

5) Try setting off your smoke alarm at night.

6) If she’s ever home alone, call from an unknown number and breath heavily into the phone whenever she picks up. Girls love to watch movies where this happens.

It’s not about WHAT you do, it’s about the fact that you care enough to try. Girls LOVE being scared, so go out there and show her you love her. I guarantee you that every single on of these things is more fun than geocaching with people who won’t get out of the car.

*No innuendo intended.

Book Review

A lot of people didn't like it when I used to do book reviews. I don't know why, I thought they were informative. But I'm posting one here because I haven't done it in a long time, and I just read a good book. Also, I promise it will be a short review.

I just read "Mere Christianity" again. And you know what, if you haven't read "Mere Christianity" yet, you deserve to be punched in the mouth.

comparing

A wise man once told me that nothing good can ever come from coparing yourself to others. An annoyed man once told me that he worked at a camp where they paid employees differently from week to week depending on who they thought had a good attitude. They also told everyone not to compare paychecks becuase "comparison robs us of our joy."

I will never work at Gull lake Camp. But I agree with them about comparison. It's not a good thing.

I think we compare ourselves to other people because we are insecure, and want affirmation or reassurance that we are doing alright, that we are doing good enough. We compare ourselves to people in every imaginable way, but for this instance (because this is a blog and not a book, and brevity is everything) I would like to only focus on how we tend to compare ourselves in a Christian sense. We might think that another guy is "more spiritual" or a "better person" than us. We might think that he is "accomplishing more" or is really "making a difference." On the other hand, maybe we look around at the people we interact with every day and find that on the measures that matter to us most, we are doing pretty good.

There's a whole lot I could say about this, and I think there is a lot in there worth thinking about when it comes to value, comparison, and our need to measure ourselves. But again, that's too much to go into here. Instead I'm going to skip right to a metaphor.

Lets say two men were trying to jump to the moon. Tom was able to jump two inches higher than Sam. Sam goes home to his family depressed and feeling down on himself. Not because he didn't make it to the moon; but because Tom was two inches closer than he was, and he feels bad that he is doing relatively worse on something that is important to him. At the same time, Tom goes home feeling pretty good about himself because he is a good jumper. It doesn't matter to him that he is never going to make it to the moon, he's just glad that he's getting a little bit closer than the next guy. After all, that's really all you can ask for, since no one could ever actually jump to the moon.

You can see where both of these men are in error, and they are both missing the point. It's not about how high they are jumping compared to each other, it's about getting to the moon.

Now you might say to me "but Steve, if your metaphor is about getting closer to God, or living the way that He would want us to live, I think it's important to "jump" as high as you can, and you should feel good about jumping higher and higher, even if you never get to the moon."

Good point. That's the logic I use all too often. And that's the logic that "Tom" uses. But that's assuming that our relationship with God is measured quantitatively instead of qualitatively. That's assuming that God says "good work, through your effort at being Holy you are 1.2% deserving of my Grace. Sam is only 1.1% worthy." We all know that we'll never be good enough, but we want to be as close to good enough as we can be.

What Tom and Sam should both stop and think about is that they are going about this all wrong. Lets think outside the box* and realize that no matter how high a person can jump, literally; they will never get to the moon. Even assuming that Tom could quantitatively increase his jumping powers a million times over, even if he could jump so high that he could escape the earth's gravity, he will still never get to the moon. He would burn up in the atmosphere or die without oxygen in space. In the end, it's not really about how high you can jump, it's about finding a space ship.

Am I cheating in this metaphor? Maybe you feel a little ripped off but I'm going to stick with it. Because God does not say that any of us are 1.1% or 1.2% worthy of his grace. We are all 0.0000000% worthy and Jesus is 100% worthy because really it's an all or nothing kind of thing.

Does that mean then that we should never try jumping? Can we be jealous of people who are better astronauts? Does that make John Glenn like Jesus? I don't know, it's a metaphor! Don't get too literal. It breaks down eventually.**

The point I want to make though, is that we should not be comparing ourselves to others when it comes down to this kind of thing. We should not be competing because God doesn't measure us that way. We pretend we are measured that way, but pride and insecurity are the only rewards we get for doing well or poorly on made up measures that don't matter. It's not a good competition to enter cause everyone is a loser.

*Which, in this instance, means "not like an idiot"
**As Ben Taylor taught me, it is not to be a "heuristic" metaphor

Essays on Greatness part IV

Friends, in case you have been living under a rock, in a cave, on Mars, you may not know that The Ohio State Buckeyes have recently been ranked #1 by the associated press, the USA today, Ryan Seacrest, Bill gates, and the pope.

Now, some might consider this a meaningless exercise, because the Buckeyes would, in truth, BE the number one team in the country regardless of arbitrary rankings. That's sort of like saying the united nations got together and decided that water was wet, or that Jar Jar Binks was annoying.

But I guess this is a good thing because at least it demonstrates that most of the people involved in college football rankings are in touch with reality. There have been several instances in the past in which people used the outcome of various games to support their wild ideas about Florida and USC actually being college football champions a few years back. In fact, I have taken the liberty of correcting the Wikipedia page that seemed to randomly assign championships to teams that were actually ineligible to win.*

Some people are not accepting of the fact that most of our opportunities in life are due to socioeconomic factors including race, income, level of our parents' college education, and where and when we are born. Surprisingly, it seems that most people are even less accepting of the equally true fact that even more of our daily activities are actually dictated at a much higher level by Jim Tressel. Coach Tressel's influence extends far beyond the football fields and you can thank him for most of the things that are right with America right now. Just a few things Jim has been working on lately include

1) Sunshine
2) The Office
3) Taking "Wanda Sikes at Large" off the air
4) Judge Judy
5) the 5 day work week
6) emancipation
7) Gravity.

Coach Tressel was sick once a few years back and missed a day at work. The current economic situation and the oil spill near the Gulf are both symptoms.

So please, next time someone tells you that the Buckeyes are overrated, or that Oregon should really be number one, don't argue with them. Just smile and nod and let him go on thinking whatever he wants. He may wish to tell you that the sun orbits around the moon or that in his personal opinion, Alaska should be warmer. It doesn't make much difference. Just be glad that we currently live in a world where the Buckeyes are hear to save us from ourselves on a weekly basis.

*approximately 119 teams are ineligible to be national champion ever year due to violation of NCAA rules about being the Ohio State Buckeyes. And, by the way, I am not making this up, the first such instance is a split decision between Princton and Rutgers in 1869. Both teams were 1-1. Yes that's right, two teams played ONE GAME, tied, and were both declared the national champion.

Fingers Pointing

A lot of times I learn important lessons about myself, about God, or about others. I can learn these lessons in all different kinds of ways, but mostly through screwing up. One of the frustrating things is that I feel often times like I am learning the same lessons that I could have sworn I have learned before. I will encounter something that makes me say "wow, I will really take this to heart, and it will change my perspective forever." This normally means "until I get busy, or something else seems pretty important."

So how do we remember all the wisdom we encounter? And how do we remember to hesitate from making the same mistakes we have made in the past?

I had a second grade teacher who told me that whenever you point a finger at someone,you have three more pointing back at yourself (for a visual, point just your index finger straight out in front of you, you'll see what I mean.)

I also had a pastor who told me that whenever he gives some one advice or really lays down a piece of wisdom, he feels the Holy Spirit telling him that he needs to take his own advice.

It occurs to me, when it comes to matters of sin, when DON'T we need to take our own advice? And when are we ever accusing anyone of something that we don't do ourselves in some way or another? Although we may never have lied on our taxes, does that mean we've never been dishonest? And even if we have never stolen something physical, does that mean that we have never tried to reap the benefits of something we did not sow?*

I have heard a story recently about a VERY arrogant and obnoxious student. He is very oblivious to what a negative impression he is leaving on the staff and faculty here at Peligro University** And I think to myself "wow, I wish I could really teach him a lesson. He has a lot to learn about respect" I think this as if I had nothing to learn about respect. My very profession is about challenging people to grow, and calling them out when they are wrong. What a great opportunity to remind myself every day of where I need to grow.

I want to challenge everyone (as well as myself) to think reflectively every time you either offer advice to people, or complain about the shortcomings of an individual who has done something wrong. And if you can't find something in your life that would benefit from some similar attention, I would be surprised.

Let me practice:

I think you really ought to do this whenever you can, as an effort to grow and to stay humble...and as a matter of fact, so should I.

*That is unless you are talking about a specific, isolated act, I find it difficult to say "we'll we've all smuggle a little cocaine at one time or another in our lives."

**I've learned my lesson from the Shane incident. I won't actually mention the name of my university on this blog because their Google alerts will tell them about it. And I know they check, I've talked to people who do the checking.

Holy

So I've been reading "Mere Christianity" by C.S. Lewis. And I recommend that you all do. Even if you have read it before, I think you should read it again. Lewis himself said the he didn't think much of a book that you wouldn't want to read more than once.

In this book he begins building a case for the Christian faith, starting at the beginning. Starting at the assumption that there must be some type of powerful force out there in the world, and that it must be good. (He actually takes a few chapters to get there, but I won't try to paraphrase them for you, you should just read them).

And I put my book right there and stopped, because I was struck so hard with how terrible and frightening God could be. It was amazing.

Imagine if you will, an all powerful mysterious force that could not be seen, touched, or resisted. You might as well try turning the ocean around with your hands, or blowing the sun out with your breath. And this power, this force, was good.

So good, in fact, that it could not tolerate the presence of evil. Not in the slightest. The smallest little bit of evil would immediately be destroyed in the presence of this power. Like matter approaching the sun, or a something being dropped into a pool of strong acid, anything even remotely connected with evil would be utterly incinerated the second in came in contact with this good force. Nothing but pure goodness could stand in it's way. There were no exceptions, no excuses. The moment even the slightest imperfection appeared in our hearts we could be destroyed on the spot because NOTHING short of pure goodness could be tolerated in the slightest.

This might seem cruel to you. But in fact it is the opposite of cruel. It is the complete and utter absence of cruelty, vice, pride, or sin of any kind. It only seems cruel because it is frightening. All of us have probably experienced something that we want to call "unfair" or complained about a strict boss or teacher when deep down inside we've known the whole time that it is really quite fair, and we just don't like it.

How would you feel about this terrible, awful, force of mass destruction? Because this force really IS God. I think I never really grasped (nor do I really grasp it still) How would you feel if this force appeared in your house tonight? Would you fall down on your face crying "not worthy"? Would you cower in fear, humiliated by your lack of goodness and awestruck by the uncontrollable torrents of power and goodness threatening to sweep you away? Because that's what everyone in the Bible did whenever God or an angel showed up. They ducked for cover.

This is God. No "Ifs", no "buts" however, there is an "and." This is truly God, and he is also merciful to the point that he has come up with a way to eradicate our sin without destroying us. Now the old testament language of "covering of sins" and "the wrath of God" make a lot more sense to me. We are shielded and protected from the "cruel" goodness and we are declared good despite falling short in our own efforts.

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me.

Some Writings

I took down the "hit counter" and people have stopped leaving comments as often. This means I have no way of knowing how many people are actually reading this. But I will keep posting on the internet like a man shouting the the woods or radio waves bouncing off asteroids in deep space. Then years later I can look back on everything I've done and at least be able to say "Well...that was a lot of words."

Speaking of lots of words. I realize that most people aren't interested in my writings. In fact I would bet that over 99% of the world is completely unaware of me entirely. But if you managed to make it to this blog, there is the small assumption that you may be interested in reading what I have to write. That, or you are married to me.

Regardless, here is something you may or may not want to read. I have begun working on what Hugh White once called "my files." I can't say that I am writing a book becuase that would have a coherrent purpose, there would be a goal in mind, and I would be annoyed with myself for being the kind of person who says he's writing a book when in all reality, little writing is being done.

It would be more accurate to say that sometimes I pull out a notebook and write some stuff. By sometimes, I mean hardly ever. But it does happen. In fact, that what this blog is actually for. I found a place to organize the random little things I call thoughts, and a chance to write them down without the need to try to organize them into a unified structure. The hope is that one day, I could take some of the thoughts from this blog and string them together in a way that doesn't resemble the incomprehensible ramblings of the typical emerging adult. Well anyway, I have begun to do that just a teeny weeny bit in the form of "my files." AKA--the crap I write.

SO, when I actually get around to writing a legit "thing" I may start posting a link to a google doc here on my blog. You could read them, save them, delete them, not read them, or laugh at them. It's your perogative.

Here's a link to something I started

INTRO

In it, I do use the word "book" but it's because I didn't have a better word to use.

Also, apparently I was published in the ACSD magazine this June. I found out about it last week. I guess we are not printing those any more. I was waiting for it to show up in my mailbox and it never did. If my boss hadn't noticed it I probably would have gone the rest of my life wondering if it had ever gotten published, or if ACSD was playing a prank on me.

Normally I wouldn't draw attention to this, but again, you came all the way here to my blog, I guess you like to read my writing.

My article

Reading the Gospel

So here's a thought. I know that we've all talked about this idea in church. About how the Jewish people in Jesus' time really misunderstood him. They thought he was the chosen one who was going to overthrow the Romans and lead an enslaved people to freedom and power. And they were right. He was (and is). But totally not in the way they thought he was. I'm not telling you anything you didn't already know. But this is cool.

This week I was reading my Bible and I finished the last book of the O.T. Malachi. Malachi talks about how Jesus will rise with healing in his wings to restore the people. It's the prophecy. Then Matthew starts off with visions, angels, and a star in the sky. Try reading the Gospels like you know the background, but not the ending. It's a pretty epic story. It's like Star Wars or Lord of the Rings or...The story of Moses. But with a crazy, surprise, twist ending. It's intense. Try reading it that way, it's pretty cool.

The Plans I have

"For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future"

Anyone ever head this wonderful verse from Jeremiah 29 before? It actually is a wonderful verse, as it demonstrates God's faithfulness to Israel. One of my favorite professors*, Phil Collins, says that this is one of the most misquoted verses in the entire Bible. Today when I was talking with one of my students, I got some better perspective on why.

If you read the verse in context you see that God basically says "stay put in Babylonian captivity, settle down, plant a garden, get married, and settle in for the long haul because you aren't going anywhere for at least 70 years. So why don't you just be faithful and do the best you can with what you have.

In case you didn't know, Americans are obsessed with the idea of individualism, and the idea of instant gratification. We love it. That's why we have personalized little devices that carry all our favorite music, we are positive that everyone wants to read our facebook pages (and our blogs) and we can customize everything from our academic majors to our drink at starbucks. All of which is available on the internet instantly.

So God tells his people, as a nation, to stay faithful and wait. Pass the faith onto future generations, because this generation is going to live in captivity. We have taken this as individuals to mean "God is going to lead me to some awesome calling, and after a tough ride, I am going to experience something great. This verse promises me that he has a happy plan just for me."

Notice how, in the case of Israel, God TOTALLY keeps his promises, delivers on what he says he will do, and remains faithful to a people who do not deserve it. God is the real deal, and no one is calling that into question. He really did have a plan for the Israelites, and it came true. And yet, the majority of people who originally heard this prophecy probably died slaving away in Babylonian captivity.

I know that we give the Israelites a hard time for turning their backs on God. I'm not sure how they responded to this, but I know how we would respond in today's America. Not positively.

I believe in God and his plan. I really do. But I would not be surprised not only if His plan looked different than mine (which we seem to understand) but also that it might not even look like anything that resembles a "plan" in my understanding of the word. God's ways are higher than my ways, his thoughts are higher than my thoughts, and I think that his plans might just be higher than my plans. Qualitatively as well as quantitatively.


*I just said ONE of my favorites, I still have room in my heart for Tim.

notches

Hello everyone in blogger land. Thanks for coming.

Two things.

1) I feel like I am not able to blog as much as I would like to these days because having a job and a wife makes makes me a little more busy than being a single grad student. So if you are getting frustrated with checking my blog three times a day (which I know you do)and not seeing any updates, I would suggest that you actually subscribe to this blog and You'll receive updates as I post.

2) I think I am going to try writing a "choose your own adventure novel" with the help of volunteers. So if any of you would like to help, please let me know.

And now for my brief thought on pride.

I one tried to come up with a list of things I would do to become more humble. The list ended up being to long and I couldn't remember to do all of it. So I'm going to try to start over with one thing at a time. So, here's my first idea.

Rejoice over small embarrassments. In my new job, I get to opportunity to screw up on a fairly frequent basis. Not that things are going terribly wrong, but just that there are plenty of things that I could be doing better. And when I make mistakes, and people notice, my first instinct is to try explain it in such a way that I come out looking alright. I think this is a fairly normal reaction, but it's a reaction based on avoiding embarrassment.

I know that everyone probably does this to one extent or another, but what if instead, I was able to take every embarrassment as a learning opportunity? Everyone* likes to see an arrogant jerk taken down a couple of notches. But what if I liked to see myself taken down a notch, not because I'm a glutton for punishment, but because little embarrassment that are out of my control remind me I don't control people's perceptions of myself. I think being down a few notches is a good place to be, so I should rejoice when I get that opportunity.

The bigger they are, the harder they fall, so I'll be excited to take little falls.

*or at least me

C.S. Lewis is Dead

This probably isn't news to any of you, but I've got a point to make here.

Sometimes I wonder, “what should I be doing in this life?” It seems I’ve accomplished all of my major goals. I went to Taylor, I married a women from Taylor, and I saw the buckeyes win a national championship. I’m not really sure if there is much else.

I could write a book. That’s something that I think about a lot. Although, it turns out that that would be a lot of work. Sometimes people encourage me to do it, but once you really think about what that entails...dang. Next time you think you or some one else should write a book, sit down and start doing it. It’s not very fun. I now because I’ve tried several times.

The reason i bring that up specifically is because for a pseudo-intellectual like me, becoming a writer (or better yet, a traveling inspirational speaker) is the finest thing I can think of. That’s why C.S. Lewis is my hero. Good ol’ Clive was the best in the world at taking important, abstract concepts about God and putting them into terms that people of average intellect could understand and appreciate. I wish I could be him.

But to paraphrase another author (whose name escapes me right now) When I get to heaven, Got won’t ask me “why weren’t you C.S. Lewis?” He will ask me “why were you not Steve?”
God loved C.S. Lewis. But I don’t think that he loved him because of his books. I doubt that the God of the universe was terribly impressed with Lewis’ apologetics. So what chance do I have? In the end, Lewis died and went to heaven, and was welcomed in warmly with love not because he was the greatest theologian of the century, but because he was a child of God.

Those are the same credentials that I have. And the odd thing is, even though I’m not going to have the same level of influence, or leave the same kind of legacy as Lewis did, I’m going to wind up just like him. Welcomed into heaven by the Father who loves me...just because I am his child.

Stuff Girls Like: Dancing

Welcome once again to "Stuff Girls Like." For those of you who don't remember, SGL is a installment dedicated to enlightening men on the things in this world that are universally loved by all girls, and will cause girls to act insulted if you ever question them.

It's been wedding season lately. I've been to several weddings, including my own. And I've realized that for reasons unbeknownst to me, girls can not resist the need to "get down" at every possible opportunity.

Dancing,is, I suppose, a cool enough activity. I never do it because I'm bad at it and I find it embarrassing. Sort of the way a lot of people might feel if they were asked to sing in a talent show, naked. Personally, when the music starts to play, I begin to wonder if this is the lucky day I'll get a spinal injury. Cortney, on the other hand gets SOOOO excited to "dance" with her friends.

Why "dance" in quotation marks you ask? Because when girls "dance" they actually stand in a circle facing each other and sing along loudly with the music. This is one of their favorite past times, especially when the song is about men treating women as sexual objects.

For some reason....girls love this. Hearing a musical artist reference the size of their bottoms or inform them that he would like to take them home after they've had a lot to drink is enough to make them all scream and run to the nearest open space so they can form a circle.

Girls will also demand that you join this circle. If you, (for some strange reason) do not want "move it" and sing about things that one might do to a girl in the club, then you are "no fun." Girls dancing at a wedding is a lot like jr. high kids smoking cigarettes, (as portrayed on early 90's TV). You know it's bad for you, you know you will hate it, but you run a high risk of not being accepted if you don't join in. Unlike smoking, you will also be made fun of AFTER you start dancing, because you are bad at it.

To combat this, I have decided that I am going to be doing something else when the dancing starts. I will be singing the song that makes everyone dance. Girls will be so excited when I take the stage that they will look at each other and scream and make all the men they are with feel awkward.

If you want to practice dancing right now, I suggest you get a couple of inanimate objects you can pretend are friends, and place them in a circle facing inward. Play a heavy bass beat on your speakers, and sing very loudly, the lyrics to my new hit song, which will be played at every wedding you go to next summer. It's called "fat booty club night.*"

Shawty, I see you on the dance floor.
Your proportions are pleasing, though unrealistic
I bet other women feel inferior around you.
I hope you are drinking a lot tonight
because after I dance with you I want you to make bad decisions
It's ok though. Because we are having fun.
Everyone in the club has lots of fun.
Dancing until it is very late is a good way to enjoy yourself
Dance, Dance, yeah!


* Guaranteed to make girls stand in a circle and sing.

The Ocean

I just went on a student leader retreat with LeTourneau, and it was really awesome. I learned a lot about myself and thought a lot about Christian leadership.

So you might be hearing a lot of "nuggets" that ultimately came from that retreat. So here's an interesting one.

You may remember that one time I compared God's love to the ocean. I don't think that I'm the first person to do this. Before I said that wondering if God's love would be enough for you is like wondering if the ocean would be enough water to fill your cup or wash your cloths. Well, to keep up with that analogy, if God is the ocean, then a lot of us are just people standing on the beach.

A lot of people will look at the water and think it's beautiful, and never go in. This is how I would probably be if you ever managed to drag to a beach again. The water is fine where it is, and we really like it, just as long as we don't have to get involved.

Some people will get their feet wet and test the water out a little bit. But they'll feel the undertow pulling at their feet, feel the waves rolling up against their shins, and they'll decide they don't want to go any deeper.

And then there are those who obey the current and rush in with wild abandon.* You can be completely soaked, in over your head, and surrounded entirely by the love of God. Now, I know everyone reading this is thinking "ok I get it, dive in, go in the ocean. Got it."

Well here's the thing. Maybe on my best day, I've been that person who has dove completely into the ocean with reckless abandon. But the thing is, I've climbed back out of the water. Because sadly, I'm a tourist, when I should be a professional scuba diver, and a surfer, and a deep sea fisher, and a navy SEAL, and possibly a sea cucumber.

Because even if you have been completely submerged in the water, you still haven't seen the whole ocean. You haven't explored every nook and cranny. You haven't charted every square inch of ocean floor. Until you have touched every drop of water there is, you don't really know the ocean.

And that's kind of a cool thought. There is a lot more God out there to experience.



*For those of you who were Christians in 1992 and had a tape-deck, this would be the time to think about Steven Curtis Chapman singing "Diving in."

Embers

Hey friends. I'm back and blogging in Texas. Things have been really hectic here and my job is a little bit overwhelming. I feel like I'm trying to bail water from a sinking boat with a spaghetti strainer. Note to self: Don't hire a new director of orientation three weeks before orientation.

Anyway, I've been thinking about Marriage. Probably because I just got married. I've actually been wanting to write about this kind of relationship for a long time, but I wasn't allowed to, because I had never been married. Now I've been married for less than a month, which means I'm a total expert and I know everything there is to know about marriage. If any of you would like advice on YOUR marriage, just let me know.

But anyway. I'm still in the exciting part of marriage. Cort and I are still getting to know each other, we aren't over the novelty of being "co-ed roommates," and we don't have money problems, obnoxious children, or slow metabolisms. Life is pretty cool. And yet, hopefully, the best is yet to come.

People tell me that if things all go the way they are supposed to Cortney and I could potentially love each other MORE in twenty years than we do now. But I've never really thought of my mid-forties as an exciting time that I'm looking forward to.

I think that (in many ways) a marriage is like a fire. The interesting part, the part that attracts people's eyes and attention, is the flames. The red-orange glow and the crackling sound that make fires so attractive come from the flickering flames that jump higher and higher as you add more fuel.

But the REAL purpose of the fire, the warmth, comes from the embers. The glowing coals at the bottom of the pile is really the part that throws off the most heat. Anyone who has ever really cooked over a fire knows that you wait a while for it to burn down, and cook the food low over the hot coals. The flames are pretty, but they aren't really doing nearly as much for you in the long run.

And I hope that's what marriage is like. I hope that when a lot of the flames die out, we'll be left with glowing coals, hot embers that are more powerful than the flames ever were.

I was happy when I realized this. I was even more happy when I realized that embers and flames aren't always mutually exclusive. After all, once you get some good embers going, you can always add more fuel to the fire. :)

Pepper Spray

So I am back in Texas with my new wife and my new job. To be honest I'm more excited about the wife part. Our wedding was great and so was our honeymoon. I'd like to tell you all about them but the thing is, I have so many thoughts and emotions on the topic, I would have no way of breaking any of it down into coherent posts of an acceptable length. It's like there's a party in my head and everyone there has had way too much caffeine and lady Gaga is about to perform live in my cerebellum.

So we are going to have to wait until the contents settle a little bit before I can reflect on all of these experiences. And if you EVER expect me to talk about the tragic events that transpired in the NBA involving the king of Ohio then you are going to be disappointed because I JUST can't talk about it.

Instead I want to tell you about the time my wife pepper sprayed me.

Cortney and I had recently returned to Chicago and she found her pepper spray key chain that someone paranoid had given her as a gift. Now I had been asking her for a year if she wanted to pepper spray me because I kinda want to know how bad it would hurt, I wanted to have a really funny story, and because I wanted to show off and impress Cortney with my bravery and toughness.

Girls are never impressed by the right things.

Her brother was in the room as well and he used to be in the marines, he said "oh yeah I did that once. You wanna spray me too?" And Cort said..."yeah"

So amidst the violent protests of her mother, Cortney lead me and her brother Corey outside and sprayed us both in the face.

3 times.

For those of you who didn't know. Pepper spray does not begin working immediately. In fact you feel almost nothing the second it hits your skin. If this ever happens to you don't say "I don't think it's working, try it again. This time make sure you get it in my eye." You also probably shouldn't try to rub it all over your face just to make sure you got a "healthy dose."

Friends, let me tell you about a world of hurt. I've never given birth to a baby before, but I imagine that this is what it would feel like if you gave birth with your face, and the baby was make of paper cuts, sand-paper, and fire, and was liberally chucking little baby fist fulls of salt at your burning eyes every 3 seconds.

Then the burning REALLY started going.

As I lay in the fetal position crying, I wondered if Cortney was impressed by my bravery and toughness. She sounded more amused than impressed, and her mother sounded a bit annoyed. I'm sure that's just the way they respond to something too awesome for words.

After about 30 minutes I was able to open my eyes a little, and after 40 minutes the burning had almost subsided. In the resulting conversation my mother in law stated that she can't think of any pain worse than getting a paper cut in that skin between your fingers.

I disagree.

Was it all worth it? Do it yourself to find out.

Job "hunt"

For those of you who have recently been in a heart wrenching job hunt (like my friend Dave, who applied to over 40 schools, or Kristen who got multiple on campus interviews that waited a month to tell her what they decided, or me, who had to move to Texas, or most of the real live adults in this world who have been out of work for a long time due to the the economy) let me tell you a story about my fiancee, who is apparently the most hirable woman in the country.

Today at 11:40 Phone call from a school that Cortney has had no previous contact with besides sending in her resume cold.

"Hello miss Korshak, we have your resume. We would like to interview you for a position at our school. Can you come in today?"

"Well I would love to but I am in chicago right now and you are in Texas and I am getting married in 4 days so I can't come down right now."

"Oh ok, well can we interview you over the phone later today?"

Today at 1:20 Phone interview, goes pretty well.


Today at 2:50
"Hello Miss Korshak, how would you like to get married and get a job all in one week...by the way, we need to know by 4:00?"

Oh yes that's right my friends. Cortney went through the hiring process in 5 hours. Let us also keep in mind that her track record for her career is now

2 phone interviews = 2 jobs

This does not count the time she told a school she wasn't interested in interviewing with them becuase they also wanted to make her the head soccer coach.

Apparently Cortney can't miss. I have decided that next time we move I am going to move I am just going to be

A leave of absence

Hey friends.

It's been a difficult few days. Now that LeBron has left Cleveland I've had to double my depression meds and triple my therapy. But there is a chance that I will still be able to scrape together some semblance of meaning in life. I can still have kids and send them to Taylor.

Anyway. This week I am going to be going to Illinois to get married, then off to my honeymoon. I would like to still be blogging in the middle of all that, but I have a feeling that Cortney would rather I pay attention to her. SO, I think it will be a while before I am back here bloging. I hope that in that time we will figure out a solution to the LeBron situation. In the mean-time, peep these engagement pictures that my sister took of us last week.

Le Bron Watch

Friends, we are living in dangerous times.

Lebron James, arguably the most amazing person not named Tressel to walk the earth since the fall of the Roman Empire, is becoming a free agent tonight in less than an hour.

This means that LeBron could potentially leave Cleveland.
If this happens, Cleveland is done for. Not just the team...the city. It is quite possible that the entire city will pack up and move away.

This is a REAL NEWS ARTICLE that I did not write, or find in the onion.

Friends, this is it. If I wasn't getting married this would have the potential to be the worst summer of my life.

We could potentially be on the verge of the biggest national disaster to befall Ohio since Michigan was admitted to the Union.

Watch and pray friends. It's all we can do.

quick and random

Hey friends

A few quick thoughts.

1) Remember how great I said Texas was? Last night the air conditioning quit in the house I'm staying in. I kid you not, 92 degrees inside the house while I was trying to go to sleep. Was it 92 degrees in YOUR house last night you lucky Midwesterners?

2) In case something TERRIBLE happens I want to be proactive and make myself very clear. I am NOT a bandwagon Cavs fan. I am a dedicated LeBron fan. If he trades to the bulls or the heat I am gonna be buying their merchandise so fast it's gonna make your head spin. I want LeBron to have the greatest Career in NBA history, because no matter where he plays, he is an Akron boy. (He has my zip code, 330, tattooed on his arm). I might even put Miami back on my map of the united states.

3) I made fun of twitter in a previous post. AJ in Nashville pointed out that I was knocking it before I tried it. Friends have recently encouraged me to start "tweeting." Is this a good idea? let me get some feedback. I don't want to view it as a way to "stay in touch" I want to view it as a way to export my humor in bite sized chunklets to people who want it. Maybe it's a bad idea...I don't know

A New Home

Greetings again from the Great Nation of Texas! I want you all to know that if the sun goes out in the next few years, don't worry, Texas is hot enough to heat all of your homes for the next decade until we get the situation figured out.

Many of you have been asking, "Steve, you seem to really be taking to Texas. How does that coincide with your love for Ohio? Do you think that you will love Texas more than Ohio? Will you become a Longhorns fan or root for Texas A&M? Will you forget how to read if you move to the "south?" Are you getting enough liquids?"

All these are good questions. And I must admit, I do like it down here. I think that the Nation of Texas has wooed me like so few other semi-independent city states could. I mean, don't you think I would fall in love with a state whose state food was Chili?*

Also The Constitution of 1845, which was the resolution that allowed Texas into the Union, stated that Texas had the right to divide into 4 states in addition to the original Texas. That legal right still remains true.** If you have been paying any attention to the reorganization of college football these past few weeks you would realize that Texas might actually take advantage of this state right so it can be represented 5 times in the "big" 12. Or as it will then be known the "Texas Twelve"

But even though I am really beginning to love this quasi-Mexican playground for guns and pick-up trucks I cannot ever give up my love for the one and only. Ohio will always remain number one in my heart. It will also always remain number two in my heart, just so Texas doesn't get cocky. The general area that is called the Midwest comes in at a close 3rd because it contains the birthplaces of Cortney, both my sisters, both my parents, as well Taylor University, and of course, most importantly Ohio.

As you can see below, I have recolored this collection of states to more clearly represent how I now understand America.
(click to enlarge, seriously)



As you can see I am most concerned with Ohio and Texas (as should you be) and the other 46 states*** I consider "other" because all though I am sure they are all great, in their own way, well...you know how I feel.

Texas Fact: Texas is home to more presidents named George Bush than any other State (Two).

Ohio "Fact": Ohio invented Democracy, electricity, chocolate, paid vacations, seafaring, animal husbandry, the civil rights act of 1957, and shamwow

If you are new to my blog and would like to know more about my thoughts on Ohio, just click the "ohio" tag on the bottom of this post.

*I am not making this up
**I'm not making this up either
***You heard me

Nevin Street Give Away

Hello faithful followers. My friend Cristi has been requesting that I have a give-away on my blog, and my corporate sponsor has been trying to attract new business. So here's what I've decided to do:

When I was an undergrad I had a goofy friend by the name of Ben Blake. He was a good friend, and a silly man. He loved coffee, old books, and doodling. One of my good friends. But then one day something terrible happened. He fell in love. To make a long story short, Ben left our home at Taylor University to be with his girlfriend. (Normally I would get mad at something like this but like I said, I made a long story short, and I actually think it was a good decision.)

Ben realized that his new school was awful compared to Taylor. (Every school is awful compared to Taylor, so I don't find this surprising.) So Ben decided he was just going to drink coffee for the next year. And Nevin Street Coffee was born.*

Now Ben is married to said girlfriend and he and a buddy run an online business selling fresh coffee grounds. But not only that, the president of said inferior school told Ben, "you should open a coffee shop on campus" so let it be written, so let it be done. Ben is now in the process of opening a physical coffee "spot."

Anyway, the moral of this story is: click the picture of the Nevin Street logo on the right side of my blog, it will take you to his website. If you by a pound of coffee and write in the "special notes" section that you were referred from the Dangerzone, you will be in a drawing for a free Nevin Street mug. I already bought two...they are really cool. And since there about 4 people who read my blog, you have to realize that your odds of winning this drawing are pretty cool.

This "Contest" starts today and goes through August 1st.

Enjoy

*I realize that doesn't really make sense but I liked the way it sounded

It's the thought that counts

If anyone thinks too much and doesn't understand his/her faith, I hope this is an encouragement to you.

Sometimes I struggle with or question things about the Christian faith that we seem to commonly accept here in this little place I like to call 21st century, white, middle-class, evangelical America*. I think by now you all know that I struggle with the idea of "calling."

Well here's another one that keeps me up at night. Prayer. Good night, I do not understand this thing. Using the best of my logic I have decided that God deciding to supernaturally intervene in the affairs of man because I asked him to doesn't really make sense. What happens when two different people pray for opposing outcomes? (Michigan Wolverines pray they will beat the Buckeyes, I pray that their bus catches on fire on the way to the game). God cannot grant mutually exclusive requests,** so who gets to have their prayer answered? And if the bus did catch fire, and police realized it was because a brave patriot doused it in gasoline the night before, did GOD make the bus catch fire, or did some man (who is my hero) really do the work? In that case, who gets the credit? One might say that God "used" that man, but if the man had decided differently, could he have then thwarted God's plan? Or does the man not have free-will? oops. Didn't mean to get into that conversation. But then again if you don't really have free-will then prayer is kind of a moot point anyway because God has already done what he is going to do.

what? Wait, does this stack up with what I read in the Bible? I can't even tell anymore.

I get skeptical when people tell me stories. A girl at Taylor had a spontaneous remission of Cancer. There were people who would be quick to tell you that God performed a miracle. Why? Because of prayer. A lot of people who pray still die, and a lot of people who don't pray live. So what gives? Instead of getting all excited and praising God....I get curious.

And sometimes I dislike that. Sometimes I think it means that I have a weak faith are that I am doubting God. But I am not really doubting. I am just questioning. And then I came across this little verse-nugget

Proverbs 25:2--It is the glory of god to conceal a matter; to search out a matter is the glory of kings.


We will never be like Christ, but the effort to be Christ-like is honoring to God. We emphasize the journey, because we know we are traveling towards a destination we know we cannot reach this side of Heaven...so the journey is king. In the same way, I will never understand God, but I hope that these endless circular patterns of thought are honoring to God. Because I am searching after him with my brain. My intellectual journey, is hopefully in it's own way, as much of a praise as the person who shouts hallelujah. Because we are both saying the same thing.

"Lord, I want more of you"


*Located in the Mid-West

**But God can do ANYTHING...yeah, but not stuff that just doesn't even make sense. I guess maybe He could, but that would mean suspending the boundaries of reality as we know them...which maybe He does...but if He does that we might as well give up trying to understand anything because at that point anything and everything is fair game. In which case, I am going to stop writing blogs and concentrate more on video games.

Goin' South

Howdy Y'all

Today is my first of many blog-post from the great Nation of Texas.
Quiz: Six different nations claimed Texas at some point in history. This does not count indigenous peoples or native tribes. Can you name all six? (The answers will be given at the end of this post)

For those of you who I haven't told (or who haven't gone to ACSD) I got a job at LeTourneau University in Longview Texas. "Wow," you might say "How did you ever find yourself down there Steve?" Well, I legitimately do like the place. I honestly and truly do. I think it will be a good fit for me and I already KNOW that it is a good fit for Cortney, and she is really excited to move down here and hang out with all the hispanos. But why here out of all the schools in the CCCU? Mainly because they were the only school that returned my E-mail.*


And so I loaded my trusty Honda with a variety of goods and possessions and struck out due South with a song in my heart and a pocket full of dreams.

It took about seventy billion hours to drive to Longview, and I learned that by using an precise mathematical formula developed by MIT students, you can actually calculate your current geographic latitude in America based on the number of Country Music stations playing on your car radio.

Also, I stopped at a motel six that was straight out of a B-list horror movie. It was seedy and smelly and possibly on an Indian burial ground. I believe that no fewer than 4.7 murders took place while I slept there. Expect this story to be made into a movie and coming to a Redbox near you.

I've never really been a fan of the "South" but I think that Texas is a world onto itself. Actually it's big enough to be several worlds unto themselves. Everyone in East Texas (which is now where I live) wants you to know that they aren't from South Texas or West Texas, as these places are apparently less desirable. I don't know which part of Texas is the one that supports Cowboy hats but I hope it's the East.

I start my new job tomorrow! Further updates will follow I'm sure.

Check the comments on this post for the answer to the Trivia question

*I had two phone interviews, and got one job. So that's a 50% success rate. Pretty impressive I think. What happened to the other job you ask? Barry Walsh took it...

Maslow

For those of you who didn't know, I was a psychology major in undergrad. Having a bachelors degree in psychology means that I am an expert in all things psychological and that if I ever offer you advice it is as if a licensed clinical counselor just gave you treatment. And most of the time I don't even charge.

As an authority in the psychological realm I would like to educate you on a little something called "Maslow's hierarchy of needs." This is a model proposed by Abe Maslow, that pretty much says that some needs are more important, and more urgent than other needs. He ranked these needs and put them in a little pyramid so it would be easier for the freshmen to memorize.



As you can see, the basic stuff is on the bottom, and the stuff we student development professionals focus on are at the top. The theory is that people need to have their needs met in order. So trying to bolster the self esteem of a person who is quite literally starving to death will be ineffective and is pretty much just going to make you look like a jerk.*

Well, since I am a specialist, I would like to make an important addition to this model, and I am completely qualified to do so, so look for it in the new textbooks coming out this fall**

I've been walking around in Washington D.C. the last few days and I have determined that "going to the bathroom" is the most basic (and important) need there is.

Why is that you ask? Because when you need to go, there is NOTHING in the world that matters. My house could be on fire and if I really needed to use the restroom I would probably stop to do my business before I ran out. And you would too. Conversely, if you have really had to go to the bathroom and you get the chance to, nothing can get you down for at least a minute. A man seeing an oasis in a desert is not as happy as a girl on a bus who sees a rest area.

So next time you are in a major city, where none of the businesses have customer rest-rooms and you have to walk 7 miles to get to the train to take you to a place where you can walk 2 miles back the way you came... think about Maslow, and how he apparently has never been in your shoes.

*Christian missionaries are getting better at this. People's hearts are more receptive to the gospel when they aren't worried about whether or not they will eat that week.

**It's the only thing they changed in the old textbook, except the pages are in a different order and they are glossier...also there are more pictures of ethnic minorities. The new text is $119 and required for class.

First Impressions

Hello everyone. I am blogging to "y'all" all the way from the great nation of Texas.

Cortney and I are at LeTourneau University attempting to fool the administration into hiring me. Using words like "learning outcomes," "strategic," and "collaboration," I have assumed the persona of "professional Steve" and no one will ever be the wiser.

Cortney and I were also able to catch up on the last two episodes of LOST, but since a speaker at my hooding gave away a major plot point I found myself slightly underwhelmed. I guess I don't know how I would have ended a seven year series any better than they did, but I kinda assumed that the growing mysteries of the island would be addressed in some satisfactory manner. As much as I loved LOST, I've realized you just have to be satisfied with this explanation: "Whelp, that was one crazy island, guess we'll never know."

But anyway, we are at LeTourneau, we got a gift basket, the Dean of Students picked me up at the airport, and everyone remembers Josh Wymore. The majority of people are really nice and they are treating Cortney like a high maintenance celebrity (chauffeuring her around, getting her food whenever she wants, making phone calls for her and trying to get her a job at a local high-school)

Today we are going to look at apartments because everyone is acting like we are definitely going to be here next year. Of course, I am assuming this is exactly how they treated the last guy they interviewed too. Needless to say, this is the most important I have ever felt before. If I get hired I expect this type of treatment to continue every day for as long as I am here.

I could have good thing going for me here at LETU so please, don't anyone tell them that I am just a kid.

Shakespeare II

Hey friends. Sorry it's been so long. Life has been hectic, and it's not slowing down for at least two weeks. I'm leaving for Texas, and then for Washington D.C. So you will probably have to be brave and live without my blog for a few days (if you can).

So I'll leave you with a parting thought. When I went to go see that play I was struck by a powerful line. King "Whats-his-face" feels guilty for the death of his wife. Some-one tells him to forgive himself and move on. He says this.

Whilst I remember
Her and her virtues, I cannot forget
My blemishes in them, and so still think of
The wrong I did myself

He finds the remembering his wife and her virtues is intertwined with him remembering his own transgressions.

So what if he forgets his sin? Will he forget his wife? Maybe this is why after 16 years he hasn't let go. I don't think that this means we should live in constant guilt, but I think that we SHOULD link our sins to God's forgiveness.

David says in Psalm 51:3
"For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me"

The difference between us and king "what's his face" is that even though both of us always have our sins before us, our sins are forgiven by the one we would remember. The haunting memory of his wife condemns him, but the memory of our god liberates us.

So keep your sins before you. Forget ye not the virtues of your Lord and remember your blemishes in them.

Oh by the way, in the end of the play the guys wife comes back, and he is totally redeemed, but the experiences he has had teach him a lesson and he lives the rest of his life as a changed man. Maybe there is a point in that too.

Have fun pondering Shakespeare and the Bible for a few days. And congratulations to Ben Blake, owner of Nevin Street Coffee. He got married last weekend!

Behind Bars

Hello friends. Sorry it’s been so long. My life has been a “crazy town” in the words of Mallory Jones.

I’m a bit intimidated now because I have just learned that my professor and guru, the one and only Tim Herrmann is now a follower of my blog. My blog has always been family friendly, but now I think I am going to be more conscious of my spelling and grammar. From now on expect all blog posts to be in perfect APA*

But anyway, now on to what I was planning on writing.

I went to see Shakespeare behind bars two days ago. What is that you ask? It is a bunch of inmates in a prison who perform Shakespeare. What? Steve attending something to do with Shakespeare? Did the acorns really make you that sick? Well, I initially went against my will but after the entire experience I was glad I went. So though I am not a Shakespeare guy by any stretch of the imagination, don’t be shocked with I speak of this experience in a positive light.

I’m not sure what you are envisioning here but let me start off by telling you that this is not a traveling act of white collar criminals on probation. You have to go to a prison to see this show. These actors (all men) were really, really into it. They sounded like a professional troupe of actors who had really given their lives to Shakespeare. Because in some ways, they have. This program has given them something to live for and a chance to be remembered for something other than their crime. There was a twenty minute Q and A following the performance. You should have heard these men talk about how Shakespeare has transformed their lives.

Some of the actors played the role of women. When asked how they did it so convincingly they explained how this process had taught them empathy. Truly truly taught them empathy. It gave them a greater understanding of their crimes and the way they had treated women before entering prison. I think most about the character whose actions in the play caused his wife to die with grief. In the second act (16 years later) he was so repentant and angry with himself you could see he blamed himself and wished he could change who he had been. That actor murdered his wife in real life and he had been in prison for 16 years.

I think I’m going to need a few posts to really capture what I learned from these inmates. Things were happening on so many levels. If you want to know more about Shakespeare behind bars click here. (Actually, this is not a link to the performance I went to. In 2005 there was a documentary made about SBB and this link is to that documentary.)

But just so you all know, I’m not going to start acting like I like reading Shakespeare now, I’m just glad that something so boring has redemptive qualities.

*Not at all true. APA tells me not to write with footnotes. I tell APA that he needs to get a girlfriend and stop looking over my shoulder to see where I’m putting my commas.

Acorns

Friends, I just ate an Acorn.

I was outside on Huntington's beautiful campus and the ground beneath my feat was littered with acorns, or as I like to call them, "nature's tootsie rolls." I thought to myself "If I was a squirrel, I would be so pumped right now. There is food everywhere!" And then I wondered why squirrels get all the easy breaks. I want copious amounts of free snacks whenever I walk past Beth Hale's apartment, and since I'm a white man in America I am used to getting what I want.

So I put one in my mouth and tried to keep walking all nonchalantly. Because if anyone saw me doing it I wouldn't want to look too chalant. I crack it open with my teeth and go after the "meat" inside. And you know what I learned?

I learned that there is a reason man does not eat acorns. Evolutionary psychology states that if something tastes like a sweaty guy peed in a shell and threw it in the mud, you should not eat that thing (Ohman, Mineka, 2001).

After spitting for a while a resolved that if this "nut" or "devil-spawn" was not poisonous I would master its ways and learn to enjoy it so I could impress my friends and make them jealous as I effortlessly snacked on nature while they stood by watching like hungry cavemen unable to harness the environment to feed themselves.

Turns out they ARE poisonous. The Tome of All Knowledge and Josh Wymore's most commonly visited website told me so. But painstaking and time consuming processes can remove the poison (tannin) from the Acorn to make it an edible food. The Native Americans (or First people) ate them regularly and it was a staple in their diet. It is exactly this kind of ingenuity that allowed them to find America first.

All that to say, I probably wouldn't have been hungry enough to start eating acorns today if I hadn't eaten a stupid SALAD for dinner. I thought eating a salad would be as good as real food, but like a guy taking his cousin to prom, I found out that sometimes you're just lying to yourself.

So next time you are out on a beautiful day like today and you happen across a cache of delicious looking acorns, remember this story and the lesson we've learned. Don't eat salads.

This story is 100% true.

Ohman, A.; Mineka, S. (2001). "Fears, phobias, and preparedness: Toward an evolved module of fear and fear learning" (PDF). Psychological Review 108 (3): 483–522. doi:10.1037/0033-295X.108.3.483. Retrieved 2008-06-16.

"Called" out

So the other day I'm having a conversation about acsessability in higher education. (The same type of thing all of you readers were probably also talking about the other day.)

The issue, in a nutshell, is that everyone wants higher ed to make degrees more available to everyone. Let's make America a more educated place. Good call, but if you do that, it's going to devalue existing degrees. It's like saying "Hey, people are poor, let's print more money." It's not really a win-win situation. In the short run it's a win-lose, and in the long run...I'm not really sure.

But I was defending my point of view by saying that degree inflation is making it very difficult for even trained people to find a job. For example, I (Steve Conn) have a master's degree in higher ed. and am having difficulty finding entry level positions as a hall director at small Christian schools. That's basically like a D-1 college basketball player getting cut from a church league basketball team becuase for some reason the church league is FULL of D-1 college basketball players and you are no longer as special as you thought.

Then she drops the bomb on me. She says "is it really that you can't find a job or is that you are only looking for jobs in higher education?"

I thought to myself "Well what else WOULD I be looking for? Remember how that's what I've spent two years and $20,000 explicitly training for? But then I realized something. Even in white America there is still a great disparity between socio-ecenomic classes. Most people in this country (let alone the world) are looking for work so they can have money to pay for their needs. I on the other hand am so priviledged that I can delay working for two years AFTER college to go to more school, then look for a specific job in a specific field. Some of my peers even have the audacity to be even MORE selective and be choosey about WHICH small christian school hires them to be a hall director. I actually know some people down-right DISSAPOINTED becuase they have a job at a school that is "so-so but not great."

People are starving and some of us are upset becuase they forgot the cherry on our ice cream sunday.

I forgot that I'm not having a difficulty finding a job. I'm having difficulty finding a job that serves my desires, interests, and personal goals. I think allegedly I got an education to be a public servant, but it would appear that me (and most of the people I know) expect that my education is going to provide me with all the stuff I want.

Generally speaking, isn't a job supposed to be an exchange? I give you my time and you give me some money? But I believe that most of the people I spend most of my time with (including me) think that a job must be a "win-win" situation. You give me money, and you also give me a sense of personal fulfillment, and you give me professonal development, and you give me good supervison, and you give me a good balence of challenge and support, and you give me a good community. Then maybe I will consent to giving you my time, as long as it is spent on stuff I kinda enjoy.

No one would have said it that way...but it really describes a lot of people. And if you are getting your master's degree in higher education right now...it might be you.

I surrender all

Sorry it's been so long since I've blogged. my life has been "a crazy town" as Mallory Jones would say.

So I was in church the other day and I sang these words:

All to Jesus I surrender;
All to Him I freely give;
I will ever love and trust Him,
In His presence daily live.

I surrender all,
I surrender all;
All to Thee, my blessed Savior,
I surrender all.

Then it struck me "good night, that is a frightening thought."
I had to stop singing.

Not that I think it's bad to surrender all to Jesus, but rather, it has frightening implications. George McDonald once said that asking Jesus to fix something in your heart was dangerous because as soon as He was in He would start fixing all kinds of things you didn't ask for. And soon he'd be tearing down walls and building additions and doing any number of things you're uncomfortable with. For those of you who loved the 90's imagine inviting Tim Taylor from Home Improvement to remodel your bathroom.

Anyway, it is easy to surrender stuff to God when it’s the stuff you expect to surrender. You are ready to make hard sacrifices as long as they are the sacrifices you expect. For example, as Christians we are probably on board with the fact that money should not be our ultimate priority and God might “call” us to a career that doesn’t make a lot of money. Ok, done. But what if God wanted you to surrender something surprising?

For example, I think of myself as a pretty intelligent guy, and I’m finishing up my masters degree. So you could say I am willing to surrender all and use my intelligence and my degree for the Lord any way He sees fit…As long as that means I actually get to feel like I’m using my intelligence and my education.

What if, (horror of horrors) God “calls” me somewhere where I don’t get to make use of my brain? Henri Nowen decided to leave his position as a regarded priest and scholar to work at a mental institution where patients neither understood nor appreciated his words, his experience, or his education. It was hard and humbling. But he CHOSE that. What if that just kind of “happens” to me? What if God wants me to surrender many of my skills and passions not by using them for Him, but by not using them at all?

“Oh no Steve, that could never happen,” I can hear you say. “God does not work that way.” Oh really? God’s ways are beyond my ways. Maybe to him me “wasting” my talents isn’t a waste at all. Maybe that’s His way of making me humble, and to Him that is a great use of my talents.

It freaked me out. Because I realized that God could actually ask me to surrender anything, and according to the song I was singing, I’m just going to go along with it.

And I will, (I hope) but sit back and think about it. Could you surrender your health? Your friendships? The best years of your life? I think that my whole life I’ve really been singing

“I surrender all, as long as I think it’s a good thing to surrender.”

Now I am not suggesting that God is going to make me "surrender" by committing crazy sins and doing things that are inconsistent with God's character but I think that as a 21st century American evangelical I am tempted to imagine that God's character is pretty convenient for me.