Adventures in no man's land

Hello all. I've had some interesting thoughts and discussion about "calling" on my last post. I think that I should return to that topic in the very near future (and I think I shall) but before I do that let me just tell you something.

If you have never registered for a wedding before, you are in for an experience. cortney and I went to Target the other day and the people there said "here is a price gun. Go knock yourself out." That's how it should work.

Then we went to Bed Bath and Beyond. Friends, let me tell you something....whoa.
First of all, I told Cortney that she should be in charge of the Bed and Bath and I would take care of anything that was beyond. I was hoping that meant things like garage or office or Alpha Centauri . But instead, it actually meant "Bed, Bathroom, Kitchen, and crap you don't need."

When we arrived at the store Cortney and I approached the desk like FOOLS, thinking that it would be a simple process. Instead we were ushered to a lavishly decorated corner full of $fine$ china. There we were greeted and congratualted by some very friendly people that wanted to know everything about us, and who wanted to put everything about us in writing*

After the interview (which I was assured was for our benefit) Nicole (our shopping consultant) offered to take us around the store herself to point out things we need and things we REALLY need.

This was a great bonding moment for me and Cortney. Because we said "NO" and we began wandering around by ourselves in a land of opulence and consumerism we could only hope others could afford for us. As much as you would expect me to hate this we actually had a REALLY fun time, until Cortney hit a blood-sugar shortage and started telling me she needed a snack. This is my cue to start being REALLY nice to her.**

We then brought our selections back to Nicole who went through the list item by item to make sure we didn't miss anything (What would we have done without her?).

But let me cut to the chase for you all and tell you about my newest scheme. When you register of obscene amounts of merchandise they will GIVE you FREE merchandise. Don't think this is a great deal? Listen to this. If you register for $300 of silverware, you get one utensil of your choice for free! (that's one fork). If you register for $800 of fancy knives, you get...another knife!

Now here's the catch. You don't actually have to BUY anything. You just register for stuff. So. Cortney and I are going into full time business registering at BB&B across the nation under different Aliases. Oh yes that's right my friends, they don't check your ID. Forget wedding presents, we are going to furnish our entire home with the free benefits of registering!

Also, just for the record. Cortney has been AMAZING and so fun and easy to deal with through the wedding process. No stress. If I didn't already love her, I would now.


*Met in college, engaged for one year, know each other's friends, graduate student...short, possibly think he's funnier than he is. Bride seems to enjoy Disney channel and folding laundry...Groom looks annoyed, not sure why...
**It's a system we've worked out. Relationships are wonderful