forgiveness

Please note that I don't think I'm saying anything new here. But rather I'd just like to share with you how strongly I recently felt the truth of something I already knew.

I finished reading "It Came From Within" By Andy Stanley, and although it could probably have been effectively summarized in 20 pages it was still a good book. One of the things it talked about doing was intentionally forgiving others through a specific exercise.

Anger basically says "you owe me." We don't normally think of it that way because what is owed to us is usually something ethereal or intangible. "You owe me time, respect, love, appreciation, your consideration, friendship, etc..." Often times we are owed things that cannot be paid back, but it doesn't change the concept. If you disagree with my oversimplification of anger I will cite Dr. Danger who was known to say "Anger is a sign of a blocked goal."* Think about this long enough you realize that it is basically true. If you still disagree you can call me and we can discuss it, or you can simply ask me next time you see me because the only people who read this blog are my family and Cortney. But I digress

Anger means "You owe me." To forgive means, "I acknowledge and cancel the debt."

The exercise I read about in the book involves detailing the things owed to you by another person. The point of this isn't to dwell on these things and fuel your anger, but rather to make sure that you have an accurate picture of what you're doing, and making sure that you haven't left anything out. Then you consciously tell God that you are canceling the debt and forgiving that person totally for what they owe you. Once you've done that, that person does NOT owe you anymore.

It's a powerfully liberating thing. You've probably heard that lending money can put strain on a relationship. Sin and anger is the same way. There is an unpleasant bond between two people as long as one person owes the other person. But to forgive that debt is to put people back in right standing with each other.

As I did this I became overwhelmed with the idea that God has a laundry list about me several miles long. He could have a detailed account that include my every thought and waking breath as owed to him. I owe him so much above and beyond what I could ever pay. And in the same way he has cancelled my debt, being fully aware of what it was.

Very liberating indeed. Sometimes it's hard to be forgiven because we would rather work to "fix" or "make right," to pay back what we owe. But when we've been forgiven that becomes unnecessary. It's a but embarrassing, a bit humiliating to have other people assume the responsibilities for our actions and cancel debts we wish to pay. But some debts cannot be repaid, and that's why we have forgiveness. A powerfully liberating thing. I'm very excited to be a forgiven man right now.

My two thoughts for the day

1) Practice forgiveness today
2) Appreciate the forgiveness you have received.


*I also cite 4 years as a psychology major. I realize that does NOT qualify me to be a councilor but lets assume that $100,000 of education left me with SOMETHING.