My Musical Debut

So this is old news but I’ll tell you anyway in case you some-how managed to miss this. It was Easter two Sundays ago!

Now the only reason I bring this up NOW is because I finally got a picture of some poser pretending to be a musician, and I thought it would go well with this post.
Rumor has it that I (Danger) used to play trombone in high school. Rumor circulated to the worship leader here at Newpointe and he asked if I wanted in the “horn section” for this years Easter service. Steve Conn? On Stage? Yes please.

But I was once again made aware of the vast difference between being vaguely aware how to play in instrument (mouth goes on the small end, noise comes out the big end) and being a musician (the “ends” are called “the mouthpiece” and “the bell”).

But for real I was standing next to two band teachers and an intimidatingly attractive older woman who were discussing the various ways to play their sixteenth note “runs.” They pulled their well preserved and loved instruments out of cases that looked like they had seen better days, but were as reliable and cherished as old friends. Their brightly polished horns produced golden tones as they tuned to each other by ear. The hands of artists at work.

I on the other hand found my discarded horn in my basement without a case. And by “my” horn I mean a trombone I stole from the Wauseon High school band-room junior year because I BELIEVE it belonged to Joel Barber and I knew he wouldn’t care. You might ask what happened to MY trombone. That’s a good question. But I know it wouldn’t have fit into a case either because the mouthpiece was permanently stuck in the slide.

Also, it is important to lubricate the slide of a trombone like the valves of a trumpet because it will stick or make a grating noise. It’s harder to play and doesn’t sound good to listen to. They recommend that you oil your slide before every use. I believe that this horn was last oiled in 2004. But that’s ok because I sprayed it down with Lemon Pledge.

When I arrived I practiced with the full band. Which made me feel unbelievably cool because the other people on stage were Good, and no one had yet figured out that I didn’t belong there. This MIGHT be because my part looked like it had been written for an 8th grader. And I don’t mean to brag, but if you gave me a month to practice I would probably dominate 8th grade band try-outs.

Afterwards a bearded trumpet player who I am assuming was related to Louis Armstrong (despite being white) asked me to play a note so he could tune to me. I failed to tell him that my tuning slide fell out on the way to the car and not remembering where it belonged, I shoved it back on haphazardly. But he said I sounded good.

Anyway, I got to play, it was a lot of fun, and it was actually an amazing worship set. Humor aside, it was sweet to see so many people being involved in worship. I couldn’t see an empty seat in the house, becuase people flooded in from all over to take part in our Easter service. We average 2,500 attendees on a given Sunday, but this week we had 3,500. Which means 1,000 people who might not know Jesus got a chance to hear the Gospel from Dwight. And I like that.
I love Easter more than any other day of the year, and I was excited to be taking part in it any way I could.

Clearly we can see that there is a direct correlation between Steve performing onstage and attendance spiking through the roof. If the administration at Newpointe understands how to capitalize on this trend we could experience some big growth in the future.

(Newpointe community church is committed to quality a worship experience because excellence honors God. Despite my comidic description I assure that my performance was "adequate" and that their services are not "run by children."

For further proof see here: http://www.newpointe.org/content.cfm?id=2006. )